1. At 47 weeks long, January has been the longest month in history.
Okay it’s only been four weekends, but it has felt interminably long. If you have managed to abstain from alcohol for this long, then you have well and truly earned that pint/glass of Prosecco.
No guilt, no shame.
2. It’s payday!
Your bank account has been (almost) restored to full health following the excesses of Christmas, meaning you can go to the pub without experiencing that nagging, “If I have one more drink, I have to have beans for dinner again tomorrow” feeling.
Yassss. (Just make sure you don’t go wild asking for cashback, you hear?)
3. You can’t go boozing on Monday, can you?
Monday is February 1st, officially marking the end of Dry January.
But who can go boozing on a Monday/risk a Tuesday hangover? Exactly.
4. There’s only so much cinema one person can be expected to take.
Your appetite for films is beginning to wane and that’s perfectly acceptable.
And frankly, if you made it through The Revenant, you ought to reward yourself with a pint.
5. Your body has forgiven you for your Yuletide indulgence
You’ve served your penance. You have resisted buying an Easter Egg in the shop. You’ve bought a Nutribullet. You even made butternut squash soup that one time.
You are forgiven.
6. Your mates have missed you.
Like, really missed you.
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7. Plus everyone is officially over Dry January now.
Michael Ball declared it to be over earlier today and that’s good enough for us.
*cracks open the bubbles*
8. Anyway, what’s the alternative — watching The Late Late Show again?
Exactly.
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